seventh post: will and desire

Actually i wanted to write about something else, but talking with a friend and looking up a few things while downloading of course very legally some weird band I used to listen to in High School, I started to see a specular and reversed way of wanting things.

What I call desire is the influence of something outside of me on me. It hooks from outside, digs and pulls me and my will to fill the distance between me and that thing.
So desire is wrong, in so much that it diminishes me. It's an outside that exercise power of my inside, and I bend myself to follow its rule.
This is I think why so many philosophies try to annihilate the concept of desire.
It is a shortcoming of the philosopher of teacher trying to spread his message that he says "Don't desire" without explaining why, and what he means by "desire". While it's still valid because it circumscribes our "desires" and keeps them in check, which is good, it also doesn't give the deeper reason, which is a shortcoming. Maybe not of the teacher or philosopher, actually, but ours. We take what's given and don't use it as a pointer to look within ourselves and at things, so terrible misunderstandings and mistakes arise.

Now, what I call WILL is me exercising myself in the outer world, me becoming conductor of the personal articulation of World Energy that is me, and letting it flow, enhanced by my conscience and awareness in doing so.
This is "pure" will, Nietzsche's real Will To Power, or Don Juan's "desire nothing", or possibly even Kant's Moral Imperative, and definitely Crowley's "DO WHAT THOU WILT".
Quoting an article: "DO WHAT THOU WILT" was misunderstood to mean do what you want, however one must consider that a human being is a single machine composed of several parts. So, when one says do what thou wilt , he/she must understand the origin of this will in order to promote or demote its importance. One is formed of a material, mental and spiritual component. These components are all controlled and directed by will that flows through the three and uniting them as one. Initiates of the sacred science are acquainted with the fact of a fourth dimension that is the base of this triad that forms a human being. True will is fourth dimension, that directs the human towards his destiny and forces him into the joy of accomplishing what he/she was meant to accomplish.

Leaving the 3-shaped systematization aside, and maybe talks about a fourth dimension of being for later(when I'll have learned more), it's clear that through self-analysis and self-awareness one can bring balance between his parts, and when there's balance simply let that Self flow toward the outside, where it naturally wants to go.
*Point of discussion: the old "Oh, so if my Self is to be a serial killer, I should just go and be a serial killer? What about a moral code? THAT'S what guarantees social life".
Well, no. Morality is a code imposed by the outside to make up for the shortcomings of the inside. If the inside has no shortcomings, the outside has no need to control or make up for anything.
And real self-analysis embraces, understands and frees parts of ourselves that only "act out", more or less destructively, when ignored or not investigated. Most behaviours that would be considered "anti-social" are results or adjustments or responses of certain parts of the Self to the outer world. Just like "morality" as commonly meant, they are a result of a dented situation. Re-compose the situation, there are no dents.

Back to WILL.
I think it's a matter of capsizing, like so many other things.
Things got, once again, turned around.
There is no "formal" or "outer" difference between desiring something of wanting something (I'm using these terms now as described above). Only a difference in intent, which is a symptom of a difference in the life of this want or desire, and the subject that acts it.
Desiring something gives gratification to the part of you that needed an "outside empowerment", because drained of its inner power, because just a part, out of balance and out of touch with itself and the Self.
While to want something means to have your self present to yourself, in check therefore with the One of which we are an articulation, and letting it flow toward the outside world.
I'd like to be able to live like that.