New Rules For Gender Definition In A Confusing Era

men don't look at women, women are too low.
looking at women is gay.

men don't appreciate women, women appreciate existing- we just allow them to.
if you appreciate a woman, you're gay.

men have only two positive emotional speeds: getting violent about something and not thinking something is gay.
everything else is gay.

men don't make love, men fuck.
if you make love to a woman, you're gay. if you fuck a woman, you're a man. if you fuck a man but don't enjoy it, you're not gay.
if you fuck a man and enjoy it violently, you are not gay.

if you're gay and you're violent about it, you're not gay.


you can tell men apart from women because nobody sees women.
if you notice someone, he's a man.
if you hear a distant whining, that's probably a dying panda. or a building collapsing. or a woman.

women are like men
if men were gay.